I am officially 21 weeks. I am feeling Violet pretty regularly. She is kind of dainty. Not much of a kicker, she likes to swim around and she likes tickling me. Jeff felt her kick last Sunday.
My skin is awesomely bad. My hives have returned which means I douse myself with prescription strength hydro cortisone all the time. I look forward to adding to my collection of stretch marks. Maybe after I am done with all this child bearing, I'll do something fierce like tattoo my stretch marks into tiger stripes or something.
Morning sickness has been at bay for the last 2 weeks so I am hoping that I am officially over it. Not that I should ever be a source of wisdom about responsible family planning but here is my two cents about being pregnant after you have children. I don't recommend getting pregnant at the beginning of summer. Because it will ruin not only your summer but your children's summer as well. I know children come whenever they want to (TRUST ME, I KNOW) but honestly, I will try my darndest to not repeat this summer ever again.
I am an emotional wreck. I am awful to be around when I am so sensitive. I have decided not to make any big emotional decisions while I am pregnant because honestly, most people would be at the losing end of the battle. My goal this holiday season is to enjoy what I can and to not rock the boat. Which probably means I will just keep to myself. So sad because I love people and thrive being in relationship with people.
You would think by reading this post that I am an ungrateful beast of a woman. But honestly, I deleted and rewrote this post several times because of the guilt and shame of feeling the way I do right now. But then I realized I had to be honest. Not only to myself but to others who I count on to love and support me. No, I'm not relishing in the fact that my body has been invaded again. But I am counting down the days when I meet my daughter and all will be forgotten and forgiven. Seeing your child for the first time does that to you. And you would think after having so many so close together that it gets old and ordinary...it doesn't matter if it's your 1st or your 19th, it never gets less miraculous.
I can't wait to meet and get to know Violet Smoot. And when she is reading this post years from now I hope she will know that she was worth every inconvenience and irritation. And I would do it all over again willingly.
You would think by reading this post that I am an ungrateful beast of a woman. But honestly, I deleted and rewrote this post several times because of the guilt and shame of feeling the way I do right now. But then I realized I had to be honest. Not only to myself but to others who I count on to love and support me. No, I'm not relishing in the fact that my body has been invaded again. But I am counting down the days when I meet my daughter and all will be forgotten and forgiven. Seeing your child for the first time does that to you. And you would think after having so many so close together that it gets old and ordinary...it doesn't matter if it's your 1st or your 19th, it never gets less miraculous.
I can't wait to meet and get to know Violet Smoot. And when she is reading this post years from now I hope she will know that she was worth every inconvenience and irritation. And I would do it all over again willingly.
4 comments:
I have said it before and I am saying it again....Yay for a little Took:) Your boys are so adorable, I can only imagine how cute this little Violet will be! Hang in there girl! I made it with 3 kids in my first 5 years of marriage, you will make it too! Thank goodness we forget alot of our troubles after the baby comes.
thank you for your honesty, friend. i always count on that from you and wouldn't want you to be any other way.
thanks, too, for your family planning advice. here's to no more summer puking...
I appreciate your post Took... Thanks for sharing. If you ever need to talk about the new coach line, give me a call! I would love to talk purse talk anytime :)
This totally could have been my post this exact time last year. Hang in there sweet Momma! I really did think I was going insane for my third. My emotions were goign crazy, I was sick of talking about myself, I just wanted to pretend I wasn't pregnant. And yea- summer sucked big time- and we had an out of coutnry visitor that kept me going.
BUT- I had the easiest delivery, recovery, little to no baby blues. Maybe this will be true for you too? Pregnancy was the hardest, but postpartum was the easiest. I am so glad you have to knowledge its all worth it, because it is. It just sucks to get thru at the moment(yea, you will likely forget and do it all over again-heh). Hang in there! You are doing great! And you get to eat anything you want for holidays. My advice is don't waste your precious stomach space on real food- go straight for dessert. :o)
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